I’m having a feeling hangover. Last night I went on a date and maybe we shared too much. He’s a beautiful, sweet person. I went home and talked to someone else Who’s also sweet and beautiful But broken and sad and dark. The decision seems like it should be easy So stupidly easy. And then […]Read more "Malfunction in Thinking"
I walk to and from work. And I walk fast. These days whenever I see a man in front of me I walk quicker Until I pass him. It’s harmless. And it feels good. Sometimes men in suits pass me. And I make it a point to speed by them even faster. The shittier and […]Read more "angry feminist exercise routine"
The same thing happens every day. You’ll sit at your computer. Type. Work. Repeat. And then that tug will hit you. To compulsively sign on and check. To talk to him. To tell him it’s alright. Even if he doesn’t care. Even if he probably does. But you just, can’t. Be gentle, and patient with […]Read more "don’t do it don’t do it okay"
I started meditating. Not after a dark night of the soul. Not to chant myself into bliss. Mostly just to try and not feel bad. My practice didn’t have a dramatic beginning. It started with a woman on a wellness podcast, who didn’t sound anything like what I expected. She was warm, not pretentious or […]Read more "meditating on meditating oh god"
Baldemar awoke to a morning that felt just like the last one. Except today the covers were twisted around him and he felt significantly less like standing up than he had yesterday. His arms were sore, as if he had been fighting someone, but he could not remember any of his dreams. Without standing he […]Read more "Baldemar Is Made of Clay: 7"
On this The night before everything changes I feel like I could vomit stones.Read more "1.19"
I’ve been working with a dramaturg/mentor to polish a play I wrote (or I should say, a play that fell out of me) after the last breakup. This afternoon she showered compliments on it. And that is not what she does. She reminded me of that several times. That she was not an easy laugher […]Read more "Terror Praise"